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  • RUSSELL

I don't look beneath me like a giant

I don't look beneath me like a giant

leave me to my own devices

I see poltergeists

and many guises and many guys in different disguises

despise and spite of all kinds mixed with defiance

Connectedly disconnected like Verizon

I'm sharp like a trident

I fight til my triumph

collide with a titan

so I don't know what it means when you say you trying

just so I could journey further, I'll push beyond resistance like a hymen

coming forth wit my demons inside me

and my conscience behind me

no mirrors, mirrors remind me

that I still can't ever find me

feel like a vampire inside it

believe me I try to keep my sanity vise gripped

but you only hold on to those things worth holding onto, like prizes

I run from normalcy dodging like Chryslers

take heed to the blind because they see more than just eyelids

I'm living lifeless

I'm feeling like life is

fulfilling with crisis

no one is righteous

no one is right then

remember the innards of gates

the embers of hate

and what they did to your faith

succumbing to the dysfunctional family members of fate

critics dismember your name

all agendas considered til you begin to deflate

November December the same

celebrating mere moments, hello hollow days-

thank u for giving me minutes of fame

no signal but calling out timber-

my temper can't always hang

when the temperature change

cold weather hinders the rain

glimmers of clarity, shimmered

then parody slithered and entered right into my injured yet enduring brain

I figured its pain

a symptom, system and gender of gain

numb on the surface yet my center is shame

feel like the winter, inside of me ugly, my inner is vain

but I won't pretend to be beautiful, these are the rigors of change

I am no victim

I have the resolve of a victor

fear is evicted

u can't fit in the picture

but I'll pour you a pitcher, in case your image is drained

maybe you'll get it, or maybe u can't

I welcome the strain

I wanna get what I can't

I battle restraint

my vivid words depicting inner symbols of deeper peace and wisdom

rekindled like memory,

deciphering details-

in dramatic paintings searching for deeper meaning between the pixels and grain

I'm just tryna behold the art inside of my frame

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